What IS Autism?

Tonight while I was driving our middle guy to CCD, he asked me out of the blue...."Mom, what IS Autism?" There it is, that lump in my throat, that uneasy feeling in my stomach and my heart beats picking up speed ten fold.

Now here's the thing, he has ask this multiple times before, but every time he asks, especially as he is getting older and understanding more, it's hard for me to to articulate all that Autism means to our family. I find it hard to properly say what exactly Autsim is because it looks very different for every child and family. So because we were pulling up to the church for his CCD class, I gave him the short version of my view of Autism. "Autism is Alley, Vin. He thinks differently then you do. He sees the world differently then you do and he communicates differently then we all do. But he is the best right?" And without skipping a beat he answered "oh yea Mom, Alley is the best" and with that hopped out of the car to go on with his night.

On my drive home, it really got me thinking though. I mean I think about Autism, and Alley, and our family ALL the time. But it's moments like this that hit me in the gut and really put me in my own thoughts. What Is Autsim to me? I came up with a couple answers....

Autism is watching the same Mickey Mouse Clubhouse episode for hundredth time.

Autism is spending a lot of money on Oreos when he only eats the filling.

Autism is finding the strongest chewy tubes that are offered.

Autism is buying Amazon out of Wiki Sticks.

Autism is learning a new form of digital communication.

Autism is having a house that is lived in functionally and not aesthetically pleasing.

Autism is countless sleepless nights.

Autism is early mornings and late bedtimes.

Autism is strategically planned outings.

Autsim is rarely getting family pictures of everyone smiling but envying the families that can say "smile" to their kids and they do.

Autism is never having a vacation "just the two of us" meaning my husband and myself.

Autism is hard....

BUT of all the things listed above this one is my favorite....

Autism makes you view the world differently. It changes you to your core. It pushes you in ways that you never knew you could handle. It shows you that you have more patience, more love in your heart and more grace then you ever knew you could have. It makes you the person you are meant to become. Autism is not just Alley, it is all of us in our family. It is us and we will continue to be proud of us.

I ask you, what does this world of special needs mean to you?

With Grace,

This Autism Mama